I actually have more friends than listed below. I really do. It's just that none of them are online. Not that being online is a criteria for coolness or a criteria for anything (accept for being online). I digress. Regardless of what it actually means to digress. Or maybe I truly am digressing. In any case here are my online friends. Check them out. But hurry back and give me more attention.

Mike "Quinn" Quinn - Mike is my ex-roommate, and oddly enough, I often miss him more than my ex-girlfriend. But in a different way. A much different way. Whooo! Boy. Anyway. Mike needs a woman. Perhaps more than I. So date him. He is a great cook. He is clean. And while he is an even bigger nerd than I am, he has been here at UMR 3 years longer. So he has an excuse. I guess.

Mike "H-dogg" Hunter - It has been said that the H-dogg cannot be faded. At least not on any regular basis. I can attest to this fact. Even though the boy is quite white, he possesses a strange sort of soul-substitute. Which makes him quite cool even though he would most likely die in a matter of minutes if left in East St. Louis. Not that this is bad. I'd personally only last about an hour longer due to my genetic makeup, but little else. Mike is my Unix mentor and he provides me with lots of good software (Perfectly legal shareware stuff, of course).

Amy "Potty Mouth" Pousson - Amy is pretty darn cool, when she puts her mind to it! Ah, I merely jest. And gestestation is Amy's middle name. Wait. No. That didn't come out right at all. Strike that. Anyway, Amy currently rooms with Quinn. So in a sense, I should be her enemy seeing as she stole my favorite roommate. I hate her. What a bit**!

Elisa "Big E" Armstrong - Elisa is quite possibly one of the nicest, smartest, least stuck-up, coolest girl on this dismal campus. And she is getting married. Figures. But this doesn't matter as much as it may seem. See, E is much too tall for me. Hence the "Big" in front of the "E". I helped design Elisa's webpage. Oh yeah, I also hooked her up with her current fiance, Ben. Ben is my first roommate at this school. Starting to see the picture? Neither am I.

Los Bike - I am proud to say that I am a member of the elitist, fraternal institution known the world over as Los Bike. I am also proud to call every member my friend. Viva Los Bike!